Advice Columnist Weighs in on Woman’s “Unsettling” Feelings about Friend’s Behavior During Pending Divorce
Providing support to a friend who is going through a divorce can sometimes be a challenging thing. Knowing when to provide a shoulder to cry on, and when to provide “tough love” to a loved one is a careful balancing act, especially when emotions are raw. One woman who wrote in to Anne Lane, Advice Columnist at Go Local Prov, a New England news site, finds herself in such a sticky situation, and wondered what she should do when facing this matter of first impression. Indeed, the woman, who signed her name as “Friendship Dilemma” wrote to Annie Lane, “For three years, my husband and I got really close with another couple. But in the last year, our friend’s marriage hit a rough patch. She’s been acting differently – bragging, being arrogant, and talking a lot about meeting other guys.” Friendship Dilemma went on to explain that her friend is now going through a divorce, and a regular conversation topic between the friends is now the new men in her friend’s life, and how they compare to her soon-to-be ex-husband. Friendship Dilemma went on to say, “I told her I don’t want to hear about it or see those pictures, but she keeps texting me with the same stuff…I’m stuck and not sure what to do. The friend I used to have fun with is gone, and I’m wondering if it’s time to say good to our friendship.”
In response to Friendship Dilemma’s cries to help save her friendship, advice columnist Annie Lane wrote back that it is understandable that navigating divorce issues through a friendship can seem complicated and challenging, and not everyone copes in the same way through a divorce. Lane advised, “Consider having an open and honest conversation with your friend. Let her know how her behavior is impacting you and that you need some space. If she values the friendship, she may take your concerns to heart. But if the situation continues to be stressful, it might be necessary to distance yourself.” In addition, Lane concluded by noting that friendships change over time and it is o.k. to come to terms with the fact that a person may actually outgrow a friendship over time. The friendships that are often worth having in life are those that bring positivity to a person’s life, and not stress or strain.
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Source:
golocalprov.com/lifestyle/dear-annie-unsettled-by-friends-mid-divorce-behavior
