NBC Chicago Report Reveals 4 Signs Of Divorce, Claims Signs Predict Whether Couple Will Divorce With 90% Accuracy
Many people probably wish that they had a crystal ball to predict whether or not their marriage will truly end in a fairytale ending, or whether it will end in separation and divorce. Indeed, the truth is that no one can really know with total certainty whether their marriage will work out or not when they say “I do” at the altar. However, some experts now say that they can predict whether a couple’s marriage will end in divorce or not just by how they communicate with each other. In a report by NBC Chicago covering a study by the Gottman Institute, an institute for couple’s counseling and mental health care education, experts reveal four warning signs in a couple’s communication with each other that tend to indicate that divorce is on the horizon. But what are those four signs, and how are they damaging to a marriage?
Divorce Warning Sign #1. Toxic Criticism
The first warning sign that the Gottman Institute believes indicates that a relationship has serious problems is toxic criticism, which they define as “criticizing your partner too often or doing so generally and unfairly.” Examples of this include comments such as, “You never wash the dishes”, or “You always forget to fill up the car with gas”. The experts note that toxic criticism is not helpful to communication with a spouse, because such comments tend to be focused on the other spouse’s character, and not about the actual issue (such as the dishes or gas).
Divorce Warning Sign #2. Defensiveness
According to the experts, defensiveness in a relationship occurs when one spouse makes excuses for their actions and takes no accountability for them. Defensiveness is a problem in a marriage because couples who become defensive get wrapped up in being defensive, and forget empathy for each other.
Divorce Warning Sign #3. Stonewalling
Stonewalling is a communication style in which a person ends or shuts down a conversation by simply ignoring the other person, and perhaps even physically removing oneself from the conversation entirely. The well-known “silent treatment” may be a way that a spouse or couple stonewalls. The experts advise that while a person may need a break to diffuse an argument, breaks from communication should not be for more than one day, and spouses should check in with one another during the break.
Divorce Warning Sign # 4. Contempt
Contempt is especially insidious in a marriage, warns the experts, because it starts out as contempt, but can, over time, develop into full-blown resentment of the other person in the relationship. Contempt can be in many forms, such as rolling eyes in response to the other person, mocking the other person, speaking sarcastically, or generally disliking the other person.
Help with Your Chicago Divorce
Whether any of these signs seem all-too-familiar, or there are other reasons that you are interested in seeking a divorce, it is important to speak with an experienced divorce attorney at the outset, to learn about your rights and options. If you are in Chicago, the experienced Chicago divorce lawyers at Birnbaum Gelfman Sharma & Arnoux, LLC are here to help. Contact Birnbaum Gelfman Sharma & Arnoux, LLC and speak to a Chicago divorce lawyer today about your rights and options.